I saw this article today and it got me thinking about my strong-willed child.
Something a LOT of us face. Strong-willed children.
I consider it a priveledge. I mean, when I am 30 minutes into an "I can button my pajamas by myself" episode, ( an episode in which not one single button has been buttoned yet) it does NOT feel like a priveledge, it feels like a pain in my rear.....
When I stop to think about the kind of person that I want my boy to grow up to be; self sufficient, strong, confident...I realize that I need to NURTURE this charateristic.
I think strong will is just what a person needs to support all of those traits.
But sometimes, I feel weak. I doubt my beliefs. You know, those moments when you are in the middle of the mall and he has a mega melt down and pratically abuses you in public? I start to wonder if I should just crack down, lower the iron fist and break his will. Teach him to do as I say. Every answer would be yes ma'am or no ma'am. He would be a perfectly obedient child who was seen and not heard.
Then, my heart wins out.
The heart that my mom gave me.
The one that clings to the belief that actions speak louder than words.
You know that old saying, "do as I say, not as I do"?
I hate that old saying.
It is for people who don't or won't show the type of respect to their children that they expect in return.
If you want your child to learn respect, show him respect.
I was raised to follow my heart and do unto others as I would have them do unto me.
Not because I was ever TOLD that.
I learned that because that is the way that my momma LIVED.
I love the words of this poem...not sure if my mom ever knew it, but she LIVED this for us kids.
If a child lives with criticism,
he learns to condemn.
If a child lives with hostility,
he learns to fight.
If a child lives with fear,
he learns to be apprehensive.
If a child lives with pity,
he learns to feel sorry for himself.
If a child lives with ridicule,
he learns to be shy.
If a child lives with jealousy,
he learns what envy is.
If a child lives with shame,
he learns to feel guilty.
If a child lives with encouragement,
he learns to be confident.
If a child lives with tolerance,
he learns to be patient.
If a child lives with praise,
he learns to be appreciative.
If a child lives with acceptance,
he learns to love.
If a child lives with approval,
he learns to like himself.
If a child lives with recognition,
he learns that it is good to have a goal.
If a child lives with sharing,
he learns about generosity.
If a child lives with honesty and fairness,
he learns what truth and justice are.
If a child lives with security,
he learns to have faith in himself and in those about him.
If a child lives with friendliness,
he learns that the world is a nice place in which to live.
If you live with serenity,
your child will live with peace of mind.
~Dorothy Law Nolte~
Somehow, her heart knew to show us all of the goodness that brought out our good characteristics.
She knew to shield us fromt he types of behaviors that would teach us bad traits.
From what I hear of my toddler years, it was NO easy task, but I know she did it. I KNOW that is how I learned to be strong willed "me".
I am pretty sure is smiling down from heaven and even giggling as she sees me get my payback with this boy Blu who tests me daily!
I strive every day to be the kind of mother that she was to us kids.
I have a Valentine's present for you all...it is a website that I found on Pinterest. If you have already received this gift then I am sorry for the repeat and also,
WHY HAVE YOU NEVER GIVEN THIS TO ME???
Anyway, I am always complaining to Big D that I wish we cooked and ate better meals at home, but lets face it, cooking is only half the battle. To REALLY achieve this night after night you have to plan ahead, shop, and actually have the good food on hand!
Well lookie at what I stumbled across on Pinterest....
I am linking up today to SUYL at Kelly's Korner today for "working moms" day.
I want to start by saying exactly what Kelly said...we are ALL working! I have taken days off before just to play "stay at home mom", and let me say, they were NOT vacation days! I admit, they do feel more fullfilling to me than my day job, but still work NO DOUBT! My stay at home mom friends always say they do not see how I do it all. But I know that the quiet moments that I have to myself in my car on the way to work, at my desk, lunch outings, etc...are things that they would consider luxuries! The grass is always greener, right?
I am a designer for a New Homes Construction Company and I love my job. The only downside to it is it is not exactly flexible...it is a Monday through Friday gig 8-5 and in metro Atlanta, you have to tack an hour to the beginning and end of that day for commuting. That is the part that is hard. By the time I get home, it is dinner time, then bath time, then bedtime. Really. That is it. That is all we do on weeknights. Blu goes to bed at 8pm, so there is no time for error! I also run an ETSY shop called the Pickle Tree that I LOVE! It is a real creative outlet for me, but attached to that are the rigors of deadlines and shopping for supplies and keeping the books...this usually takes place on Saturday mornings or...you guessed it...after 8pm!
In case you have not guessed, I don't exactly have a lot of free time. But I am not writing this post to complain or look for sympathy. I love my life and I am blessed with an amazing husband, and beautiful 3 1/2 year old son, and now another little boy on the way!
I am just writing to connect with other working moms who I know will understand the unique set of trials, guilts, and stresses that go along with trying to be in too many places all at the same time!
So who are you? Wanna be friends? Let's rap!
I like to keep up with things about Blu on this blog because I find it hard to keep a baby book and I find it easy to refer back to this when I want to reminiesce or just note when he did what!!
You on the other hand might find this boring, so consider yourself forewarned!!!
He has been a little hot and cold about a new baby. He is mostly pretty keen on it, but I think he got thrown off track a little when we found out it was a boy. He still calls him "her" and "she" sometimes!
BUT- he is starting to warm up and is really sooo sweet about it!
We keep asking him about baby names...he liked Cooper at first, but most recently he has decided that he wants to call the baby Noodle!
He calls it HIS baby. That makes me a little nervous that he might try to pick him up when I am not looking or something, but we will be on the watch out for that!
Lately, in the tub, he has been saying that he does not paly with certain toys anymore, can we put them up to give to the baby?
Most anything he does could be followed at any given moment by the statement, "babies can't do that"( ride a bike, play basebasll, put on socks), or babies don't like that" (about foods and drinks).
It is pretty clear that he is gearing up in his own little way and I wish so bad I could see into his little head to know what he thinks about it all!!!
He is starting to get so big. He peddles his little bike that he got for his birthday last year. So fast that sometimes he turns it over! He just gets up and hops back on- makes me so proud!
He is mastering his jeep powerwheels that we got for him when he was two....what can I say? We jumped the gun, we were sooo excited! He is finally growing into it!
He can put on his own shoes, socks, underwear, pants and shirt. He always says out loud, "tag goes in the back". It is so cute!
Everyday when he wakes up, the first thing he says is, "are we staying home all day"?
This morning, I had to go in his room and wake him. I was already dressed and ready for work. I was trying to let him sleep until the very last minute. He woke and immediately started crying. " I want you to take your clothes off and put on your jammies". Poor little guy. He wants to be a "stay at home" kid so bad.
Sometimes, out of the blue, he just says things like he wants to fly up to heaven to see nanny.
"Come on, momma, let's go fly up to heaven and see nanny"...such a precious child!
He loves his family and I am so glad because I am always nervous that he will not have the kind of family bonds that I had growing up since we live so far away. Recently, we were on our way to Alabama for his cousin, G's birthday party and we stopped for a bathroom break on the road. He picked a bag of rainbow chocolate chip cookies for a snack. He was LOVING those cookies. After a few minutes he said, "momma, I want to save the rest of these for Grace, and Aleah, and Sophie, and KK, and Jarah, and Josh and Scott....he doesn't miss a thing. He is so precious to me. We got to KK's house, went inside and he started playing and you know, he remembered those cookies and asked for them so he could share. LOVE HIM!
He asks almost daily about grandma and grandpa. On that same visit recently, grandpa was out of town on a trip and he still talks about going back and says "will grandpa be there this time"?
Sweet baby boy. I love you so much. I know that you are going to be such a loving big brother and great teacher. I cannot wait until we become a family of four, but I cherish these last few months that I get you all to myself.
Just one thing...can you please stop growing up so fast?
Bridesmaids and hostess gifts for spring weddings, Valentines gifts, Easter basket gifts, Graduation, Mother's Day, teacher gifts...there are so many occasions in the spring that are perfect for giving a personalized towel!
Until just recently, I sent people from the Etsy shop to my face book page to view some fabric suggestions and towel colors. It was working, but with no time to update, that just was NOT representing my fabric hoarde, ahem, collection to it's fullest. It was also hard for some people to navigate that process, or maybe I should say lack thereof. SO, in my downtime, and with the help of my brilliant sister, I came up with this:
So now, each etsy towel listing has these numbered fabric displays that make it SOOO much easier for the buyer and for me!!! Of course with the way I change my collection, this will be a chore to keep up with, but it will be worth it for the time I am saving myself and my customers!!!
Some of my new FAVES are 4, 5, 6 and 7. I just did some towels with some of those, I will have to get some pictures out there soon!!!
So, what are your favorites in the new "collection"?